[UPDATE] Poor O.J. Not ... SMH At Him ... O.J. Being Saved By His "Whimsical Friends."

O.J. almost got the knifed to death in lockup. Thank goodness The Juice's boos boys have his back!

Via National Enquirer reports:
The attack came on Feb. 16 during visiting day at Nevada’s Lovelock Correctional Center, where O.J. has been locked up since 2008.

The disgraced football great was relaxing in the prison yard, chatting with pals including a band of doting homosexuals who call themselves "The Girls." As The ENQUIRER previously reported, they provide him with protection – and back massages.

SUDDENLY, the calm atmosphere was broken by yelling and screaming as about 50 "white power" inmates staged a riot to divert the guards’ attention while a pair of hit men charged O.J. with their makeshift, but deadly, weapons.

"The guards sounded the sirens from the prison towers and rushed in with tear gas guns and other firepower," an insider told The ENQUIRER. "At first, O.J. was watching all this from a distance and didn’t even notice that two inmates were approaching him.

"Then, one of ‘The Girls’ spotted a flash of metal. It was sunlight reflecting from the blade of a knife wielded by a bald white power prison inmate rushing at O.J."

The source added: "At the same time, another one of ‘The Girls’ saw an attacker coming from the other side.

"The two white power prisoners charged toward O.J. They lunged at him and slashed at his face, coming close to cutting him. Luckily, they were blocked by his girly-man buddies. They may act like chicks but, believe me, they’re darn tough."

Given the chance to escape, a terrified, O.J. ran for the safety of his cell, ducking and weaving through the brawling inmates.

"I don’t want to die," O.J. cried as, fighting for his life, he dodged his enemies.

The cowardly football star later told a pal: "They came so close I could feel the wind as they swung their knives at my face and neck. I was thrashing my arms and trying to protect my face as I pushed and shoved to get away. Those knives would have ripped me up good."

Meanwhile, the guards, who were busy trying to control the prison riot, didn’t even see the assault on their most famous inmate.

After the riot, the prison was put on lockdown and visitation was halted. "People coming to see their loved ones were turned away in tears as soon as they arrived," said the insider.

Simpson, who’s serving up to a 33-year sentence at the institution, had been complaining to authorities about his safety. But there’s only so much they can do since he insists on being in the general prison population, which means he spends time in the yard with sexual offenders and murderers.

"O.J. is taking a big risk because he doesn’t want to be in his cell for hours at a time and isolated from everyone else," explained the insider. "Almost every day he sits around in the yard and holds court. ‘The Girls’ and other starstruck pals call him ‘The Godfather,’ and they are willing to protect him with their lives."

Authorities say little can be done to safeguard their celebrity prisoner unless he agrees to leave the general prison population and enter the more protective, but lonelier, "administrative security" area.

"The white power inmates want to kill him so they can have bragging rights," said the insider. "They want the badge of honor as the guys who got O.J. Simpson!"

Simpson, 65, has apparently built up a lot of resentment among his fellow prisoners, in part because he gets special treatment.

"Some inmates are furious at how O.J. has been pampered," revealed the insider. "He has a big screen TV in his cell and even hosted a Super Bowl party. His girlie buddies give him massages and he buys special food from the prison store that most of the other inmates can’t afford.

"He’s a celebrity, but he’s not supposed to be treated like one. Yet he is and it adds up to some of the inmates resenting the hell out of him."

But it may all become a moot point soon. In May, O.J. is scheduled for a hearing to decide if he should get a new trial due to alleged lawyer misrepresentation at his 2008 trial on charges that stemmed from an armed robbery in a Las Vegas hotel room to recover memorabilia.

As The ENQUIRER has reported, the onetime gridiron hero believes the judge will order a new trial and that he will get out on bail – but only if he lives that long.

"O.J. was badly shaken by the attack," said our prison source. "He was so scared afterward, he was actually crying. He told me, ‘I’m so close to having a chance to get out of prison, and I might not make it. Somebody doesn’t want me walking the streets again. I’ll be lucky if I get out alive.’ "

2 GUNS Trailer : Watch Mark Wahlberg & Danzel Washington Go On The Run Together

 
2 GUN stars Denzel Washington and Mark Wahlberg as "operatives from competing bureaus who are forced on the run together."
The movie also features Paula Patton, Bill Paxton, and James Marsden.

It opens in August.

Check out the trailer below!



O.J. Simpson Prison Riot Attacked Beaten Stabbed

Who says karma doesn’t catch up with people eventually? It looks like O.J. Simpson had a really close call recently and could have easily died in spite of being in a locked prison! The always-suspected double murderer found himself tangled up in a prison riot that left him actually pleading for his life! According to The National Enquirer OJ was slashed with a homemade knife and the whole thing was actually caught on camera at the Lovelock Correctional Center in Nevada.

According to the Enquirer O.J. actually cried "Please, I don’t want to die!" which is kind of ironic, don’t you think, all things considered? OJ is currently serving nine years — and perhaps the rest of his life for an armed robbery in a hotel room. A sentence that brought slight satisfaction to those who believed the football star got away with murder more than a decade ago.

OJ has also been in the news lately because there are rumblings that he could actually be Khloe Kardashian's rel father. Apparently Kris Jenner had no problem screwing her best friend’s husband a few decades ago! His children with Nicole have feared that their father is getting ready to change his will to include Khloe now as well as them.

Are you shocked to learn that OJ acted like a big baby when his life was on the line? Isn’t that what happens a lot? These guys are so vicious until they run into someone with the upper hand and then they turn into big babies! At 65 years old there is a decent chance that OJ could die in prison. His original sentence was for 33 years, but with good behavior he would be granted freedom in less than ten. Will he live long enough to see a blue sky again?

Image Credit: National Enquirer

Take a look at this video and tell me what you think  HeHe...

[REPORT] Inmates Try to Shank OJ Simpson in Prison Yard

The story sounds so unbelievable, I seriously doubt it is true, but the fact that it is so unbelievable, makes it an interesting read. I would expect this type of story to be in one of those novels you get at the airport bookstore.

Here are the details courtesy of Bossip and I will let you decide if you think it is true or not.
The attack came on Feb.16 during visiting day at Nevada's Lovelock Correctional Correctional Center . The disgraced football great was relaxing in the prison yard, chatting with pals including a band of doting homosexuals who call themselves "The Girls."
"The guards sounded the sirens from the prison towers and rushed in with tear gas guns and other firepower." "At first, O.J. was watching all this from a distance and didn’t even notice that two inmates were approaching him.
"The two white power prisoners charged toward O.J. They lunged at him and slashed at his face, coming close to cutting him. Luckily, they were blocked by his girly-man buddies. They may act like chicks but, believe me, they’re darn tough."
Given the chance to escape, a terrified, O.J. ran for the safety of his cell, ducking and weaving through the brawling inmates.
"The white power inmates want to kill him so they can have bragging rights," said the insider. "They want the badge of honor as the guys who got O.J. Simpson!"
I think someone is spreading Duck Tales behind the prison walls. I wouldn’t be shocked, if it was OJ himself, leaking these stories to keep himself in the news. If it is true, he is lucky to be alive.

The fact still remains, that OJ is the dumbest man on the planet. I am not going to get into if he is guilty or not of killing two people, but in a court of law, he was found not guilty and could have lived a quiet life. Instead, he continually got caught up in drama, until it finally caught up with him.

That’s why he is in jail right now .

[REPORT] Barbara Walters Calling It Quits ... in 2014

 
The end is near for Barbara Walters ... 'cause the head chick on "The View" is reportedly saying sayonara to her TV career in 2014.

We know Barbara has been contemplating retirement for a while -- and in 2011, told President Obama she planned to retire in 2012.

A honcho at ABC News told TMZ at the time that Barbara has joked about retiring every year since the Clinton Administration ... but now, it seems the legendary newswoman may finally be serious about it.

According to the Hollywood Reporter, Walters will make the official announcement in the coming weeks ... with her last broadcast taking place in May, 2014.

We reached out to Barbara's people for comment -- so far, no word back.

Barbara through the years

Dionne Warwick files for bankruptcy..Owes $10m

 

Walk On By singer Dionne Warwick has filed for bankruptcy in the US after amassing debts of almost $10 million (£6.6m) in taxes since 1991.  The singer's liabilities include nearly $7m owed to the IRS (Internal Revenue Service) from 1991 to 1999 and more than $3m in business taxes owed to the state of California, where she lives.

Warwick, 72, has sold more than 100 million records since the 1960s.Her publicist said she had been the victim of poor financial management. He added that Warwick had paid back the actual amount of the taxes but not penalties and interest that had accumulated over the years.

In documents filed in her home state of New Jersey this month, the singer of such classics as I Say A Little Prayer listed about $21,000 (£13,800) in monthly income and a similar amount in monthly expenses. Her publicist said she had "repeatedly attempted to offer re-payment plans and proposals to the IRS and the California Franchise Tax Board for taxes owed".

Warwick, cousin of the late Whitney Houston, won her first of five Grammy awards in 1968 with Do You Know The Way To San Jose? Her second came two years later, for the album I'll Never Fall In Love Again. She has enjoyed more charts hits than almost any other female singer.

Last March, Warwick celebrated 50 years in show business with a special event at the Grammy Museum in Los Angeles. To mark the anniversary she released Now, an album featuring new versions of some of her most famous songs. Dionne has made a huge contribution to music and to  American culture. She is beloved and respected worldwide. She has been ruined by poor choices of financial managers and advisors. Our hearts go out to  her.

Jon Hamm's No Underwear Photos Get Him Fired Up : They're Called 'Private Parts' For A Reason

Jon Hamm is sick and tired of everyone talking about his nether regions .
T"Mad Men" star , 42 , says he's , "familiar" with the crotch shots that have made their way around the Internet, but he's not necessary  OK with them .

Just last week Hamm's "package"  was brought up again  after a New York Daily News  claimed  that his private parts were becoming  a distraction on the set  of "Mad Men," due to the actor's choice to wear no underwear  while sporting tight  , 1960s style jeans .

"Most of it's tongue-in-cheek  , but it is a little rude . It just speaks to a broader freedom that people  feel they  have  -- prurience , "Hamm tell the new issue of Rolling Stone , on newstands  now , "They're called 'privates' for a reason . I'm wearing pants  , for f--k's sake," he continues . "Lay off."

Still , Hamm isn't taking  the situation to seriously  --- he understands  that there are worse things  to be called out for .

"I mean , it's not like I'm a f**king  lead miner . There are harder jobs  in the world . But when people  feel the freedom to create  Tumblr accounts  about my c**k , I feel like that  wasn't part of the deal [of fame]."

"But whatever," the well-endowed actor  adds , while reportley sipping  a Budweiser  during the interview . "I guess it's better than being called out for the opposite .
Tell me what you think ...HeHe

Tribute Artist , Original Drummer to Honor Elvis Presley

Donny Edwards will perform as Elvis Presley on Thursday during A Last Evening with the King at the Municipal Auditorium in Shreveport , Louisiana / Special to The Times

Former Elvis Presley drummer and Shreveport native DJ Fontana (right) shares the stage with Elvis sideman Scotty Moore (left), Vince Gill and Jerry Phillips, son of Sam Phillips of Sun Studios, are shown during the 2007 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Fontana will be inducted into the Louisiana Rock and Roll Hall of Fame on Thursday during A Last Evening with the King. / file/AP
When Elvis Presley debuted on the Municipal Auditorium's stage in 1954 in Shreveport , Louisiana the world was forever changed. Snappy moves and the ability to own rock 'n' roll music would secure him a spot as one of the greatest artists of all time.

That was nearly 60 years ago, and Presley's untimely death in 1977 would leave a void in America's heart. His Memphis memorial remains a snapshot of his past.

But for one man Presley's spirit lives on, and in complete hound dog fashion Donny Edwards is prepared to recreate those Louisiana Hayride moments one more time on stage.

"When you think about the history of the Municipal, having the Hayride show there, and all the great legends that have walked on that stage," Edwards said. "That was a great launching pad for him to come down here and really kind of skyrocket him selling his roots as a performer in his early years."

Some of those legends include: Johnny Horton, Slim Whitman, Johnny Cash, Jim Reeves, Hank Williams and George Jones, among many others.

For most of Edwards' adult life he has performed as "The King of Rock 'n' Roll." Since being a child he said family and friends always made a point to let him know that he had a promising "look" reminiscent of Presley. Even out and about folks do double takes, but Edwards said he's gotten pretty good about separating his real life from stage.

"I've gotten used to it. I don't try to invite it. I'm me. There was only one Elvis Presley and that's how I view the show," said Edwards, who performs regularly in Las Vegas. "I try to take my God-given talent to emulate him when I'm performing to give a tribute to him, to give a history lesson.

It's great to be able to come here and celebrate that history."
Edwards admitted that being able to sing at the Municipal has been a lifelong dream. He said he makes a point to deliver the most realistic and believable performance of Presley, but he hasn't taken it to the level of some that have gone as far to cosmetically change their look.
"Elvis is such a big icon. There are so many people who want to emulate him. It's great that he inspires so many people but at some point you have to pull the reigns back and be accountable for yourself."
As a treat, Edwards will be accompanied on drums by original Presley guitarist DJ Fontana, a Shreveport native. Fontana was at the Municipal for Presley's first performance.
"When he walked in he had all these strange clothes on. I said, 'man, what's this guy going to do?'" Fontana, 83, recalled. "I had heard his records, and his records were OK."
Fontana played with Presley for 14 years and said one thing he admired about him was his level headedness.
"He was a nice guy, a really nice man. He never got excited or mad at nobody. If something teed him off he'd sweat it out for a day or two and then he was OK," Fontana said. "He didn't holler and scream like some of the artists I know."
Both Presley and Fontana will be inducted into the Louisiana Music Hall of Fame during the performance.
"It's long overdo," said Dianne Harmon, who will accept on behalf of both artists. "(Elvis) has fans everywhere."
Harmon is a member of the board of the directors for the Municipal Auditorium and president of the Elvis Angel's Fan Club. Presenting the award is Louisiana Music Hall of Fame founder and director Mike Shepherd.
Connect with Derick Jones on Facebook or Twitter at derickjonesLA.
If you go ...
What : A Last Evening With The King .
When: Thursday . Municipal Auditorium , 705 Elvis Presley Blvd. Shreveport , Louisiana
Featuring : Elvis Presley  tribute artist , Donny Edwards  , along with DJ Fontana , The Blackwood Quartet  and Fever  , Presented by Double J. Events .
Admission : $20 -$30.
Infornation :(800) 745-3000 or www.ticketmaster .com
　
　
　

James Holmes : I'll Plead Guilty to avoid the death penalty

Colorado movie theater shooter James Holmes is prepared to enter a guilty plea in the cold-blooded killings of 12 people in exchange for life in prison instead of the death penalty ... this according to Holmes' lawyer.

Holmes' legal team offered the plea deal to prosecutors during a court session earlier today ... but according to the AP, prosecutors did not immediately accept the offer.

Prosecutors have not commented on Holmes' offer yet -- but it's likely they will consult with the families of the victims before reaching a decision.

Besides the 12 people he killed, Holmes shot an additional 58 people in the Century movie theater in Aurora, CO on the night of July 20, 2012. He was charged with 24 counts of first degree murder and 116 counts of attempted murder.

Just a thought :
Funny how these sniveling little cowards are so keen on saving their miserable lives! I'm not a violent person, but I would love to see this creep swinging from a gallows!

Colorado is trying to do away with the death penalty as I write this. They only have 3 men on death row and Colorado doesn't put people to death so give him life. He will be killed by the other prisoners.
Play insane for the crime he committed, but SANE enough to know HE doesn't want to die. I say, fry this bastard like a piece of bacon .   HeHe

[UPDATE] Anderson Cooper Approached to Take Matt Lauer's Today Show Job

***********************************************************************************
Anderson Cooper is being eyed as a possible replacement for Matt Lauer as "Today Show" host, according to multiple reports.

The CNN anchor, whose own daytime talk show is ending this year, has reportedly been approached by NBC to discuss potentially taking over for Lauer, although the exact timetable and specifics have not been made clear.

It should be emphasized that Cooper has NOT agreed to any "Today Show" deal, nor has Lauer’s exit been confirmed.

After the reports surfaced on Wednesday, an NBC executive released the following statement through a rep: "As we’ve said before, Matt Lauer is the best in the business. We want him in the ‘Today’ show anchor chair for many years to come."

"We are not considering replacing Matt Lauer," said the rep.

Lauer is under contract through 2014, although it’s possible he could depart before it expires.

Cooper’s CNN contract ends next fall.

Adding to the intrigue is a Deadline report claiming Lauer was upset about the network’s actions and called Cooper to express his disapproval.

However, that version of events is being called into question by sources at NBC, who say Lauer is on board with the possible Cooper succession plan and plans to meet with his fellow newsman to discuss it, despite the official denial.

Stay tuned.

Justin Bieber : Investigated for Battery Against Neighbor

[UPDATE] 1:34 PM PT -- One of Justin's neighbors tells TMZ ... the argument between Bieber and the accuser was NOT over a party ... it had to do with a Ferrari.

We're told Bieber had the car delivered to his home last night on a flatbed truck ... and this morning, he was racing the vehicle up and down the streets.

Neighborhood sources tell us ... the neighbor was furious about the deafening noise AND felt Justin was endangering the community by tearing through the streets at breakneck speeds.

We're told the neighbor went over to confront Justin about the situation ... and that's when the two sides got into a screaming match.

Justin Bieber has been accused of battery by a neighbor ... and cops are at the singer's home in Calabasas, CA investigating ... TMZ has learned.

Sources tell TMZ .... Justin and one of his male neighbors got into a verbal altercation just after 9 AM. We're told the argument was intense.

TMZ confirmed Justin has returned from his overseas concerts and was back home this morning.

L.A. County Sheriff's spokesperson Steve Whitmore tells TMZ ... the accuser told deputies Justin made physical contact with him and he has filed a battery report. He also claims Justin threatened him.

Sources connected with Justin's security tell TMZ ... the neighbor came on to Justin's property and began screaming that while Justin was away (overseas) there were people at the house throwing loud parties.

Our sources tell us Justin told the man to get off his property ... but they insist Justin did not have any physical contact with him.

Sources connected with JB's security tell us the singer went inside his house and security escorted the neighbor off the property.

The Sheriff's Dept. is investigating.

Amanda Knox to Be Retried for Roommate Murder

Amanda Knox will be tried again for the 2007 murder of her roommate Meredith Kercher after Italy’s highest court overturned her 2011 acquittal on Tuesday.

The stunning turn of events in the sensational saga means that the case against Knox, who returned to the United States after a four-year jail stint in Italy, will face a new trial in an appeals court in Florence, although she cannot be forced to be there.

In a statement, Knox called the court’s decision "painful," contending that "the prosecution’s theory of my involvement in Meredith’s murder has been repeatedly revealed to be completely unfounded and unfair."

"No matter what happens, my family and I will face this continuing legal battle as we always have, confident in the truth and with our heads held high in the face of wrongful accusations and unreasonable adversity," said the now-25 year old Knox.

Knox and a former boyfriend named Raffaele Sollecito were arrested shortly after Kercher’s death and convicted of murder in 2009.

The original case and Knox’s 2011 victory drew international attention.

Judge Judy's Son , Adam Levy , Embroiled In New York Rape Case

A suburban district attorney who is the son of TV's "Judge Judy" is being accused of interfering in a child rape case in which the suspect is his personal trainer and recently lived with him.

Putnam County District Attorney Adam Levy has recused himself from the investigation of Alexandru Hossu, but the local sheriff claims Levy is still involved.

"He is apparently trying to influence and affect the investigation, which could be perceived as an ethical violation of his official duties and perhaps even as an attempt to undermine it," Sheriff Donald Smith said.

In a response Monday night, Levy accused the sheriff of making "unfounded allegations and misstatements."

"My office acted properly in every aspect of the investigation," he said.

The question of Levy's involvement in the case has turned into a volley of accusations between the two men, who have clashed publicly before over traffic tickets; Levy also made a veiled criticism of the sheriff's office in a news release recently.

Hossu, 35, was arrested last week on charges that he twice raped a 12-year-old girl in 2010. The sheriff said the victim, now 15, only recently reported being raped. Hossu made a brief appearance in court Tuesday in and is due back May 7. A call to his lawyer was not immediately returned.

In his initial news release, the sheriff gave the defendant's address as Levy's home in Southeast, N.Y., about 50 miles north of New York City. Later, he described Hossu as Levy's "live-in personal trainer."

Levy said the sheriff had made a mistake. The sheriff's office said Monday that Hossu did live at Levy's home, but "the specific dates" have not been determined.

Levy said he recused himself as soon as he learned that Hossu, "who my family had known for years," was under investigation. But the sheriff said an assistant district attorney had already made the recusal decision for Levy, so it "was not really his original idea at all."

Smith said Levy's commenting on the case revealed "ongoing and improper involvement."

"In my view, Mr. Levy's comments and actions would seem to suggest that, if he could have his own way, Mr. Hossu would never have been brought to justice for his crime and Mr. Levy's relationship with him would never have been brought to the light of public scrutiny," the sheriff said.

He said Levy was trying to distract public attention "from what this case is really about: the vicious rape of a little girl by a man whom he housed and hired as his personal fitness trainer."

The sheriff also said Hossu is a Romanian in the country illegally, his work visa having expired 12 years ago. Without mentioning Levy, he said he has requested a federal investigation to determine if anyone illegally "harbored, shielded, aided or abetted" Hossu before or after the alleged rape.

Levy said last week he had no idea of Hossu's immigration status.

Both Levy and Smith are Republicans. It's not clear whether there's any underlying reason for the war of words, though the men battled last year over how to handle traffic tickets. In one of his recent statements, Levy said his office has been trying "to improve the way law enforcement agencies like the Sheriff's Department handled child sexual abuse allegations."

Lucian Chalfen, a spokesman for Westchester District Attorney Janet DiFiore, would not say whether Levy might be questioned during the investigation. But he said, "Our investigation relates to the allegations of the forcible rape."

Judy Sheindlin, who is Levy's mother, a retired New York judge and earns a reported $45 million a year as the wildly popular star of her courtroom TV show, says that's as it should be.

"The sole focus of this story should be the investigation as to whether a young girl was the victim of a very serious crime," she said Tuesday through spokesman Gary Rosen.

Ex-WWW Star X-Pac : Oops ! I Tore My Butthole

Former WWE star X-Pac tore himself a new one last weekend ... literally ... after one of his signature wrestling moves took a BLOODY turn.

According to his ex-GF's Instagram, Pac -- real name Sean Waltman -- was wrestling at an indie event in Minneapolis Saturday night when he performed his Bronco Buster ... a move where he leaps into a straddle position on some guy's face (below).

Problem is ... the other guy moved -- putting X's nuts and anus on a collision course with the ring's turnbuckle. It didn't end well for X-Pac.

X managed to finish the match after the injury, but when he got back to his hotel room he noticed a lot of blood coming from his nether regions ... and wisely went to the hospital.

X-Pac underwent surgery for a torn anus and was released today.

By the way, he also lost the match -- sooo ... zero upside here.

Just a thought :
OMG I know I shouldn't be laughing but that was one of the funniest descriptions of an injury I've ever read!! I'm dying laughing ...

I'm surprised it doesn't happen more often backstage at those events..

Once the tights come off, the real men show up....

and drop the soap.

Hugh Hefner : I've Had sex with More than 1,000 Women But Never Cheated On Wives

Hugh Hefner opens up in the new Esquire, revealing that his decades as head of the Playboy empire may well have been the remarkable fantasy life his admirers assume.

Asked to estimate the number of women with whom he’s had sex, Hefner tells the magazine, "Over a thousand, I’m sure."

But despite the staggering figure, Hefner never strayed.

"There were chunks of my life when I was married, and when I was married I never cheated," explains the publishing icon. "But I made up for it when I wasn’t married. You have to keep your hand in."

Last New Year’s Eve, Hefner got hitched for the third time,Marrying Crystal Harris, who famously left him just days before they were supposed to wed in 2011.

"He believes in love," says Harris. "Hef loves me more than anybody else in a relationship ever has. It took me time away to realize that. I think I realized that here is where I’m meant to be."

Hefner ignores the doubters who find fault in the pairing.

He tells the magazine, "All our friends think it’s made in heaven. It’s only people who don’t know us, who simply see us as stereotypes in terms of age and beauty… I just feel very, very fortunate to have found her at this stage in my life. I saved the best till last."
Check out the rest of the Hefner feature in the April Esquire .
Hugh you are so full of yourself .
　Wow, he's so proud to be a slut, shameful!
HeHe


Jim Carrey Mocks Gun Owners in Funny or Die Video "Cold Dead Hand"

Jim Carrey stars in a new Funny or Die video called "Cold Dead Hand" that’s sure to get a reaction.

The actor-comedian mocks gun enthusiasts by spoofing the late Charlton Heston (an NRA spokesperson) and playing a country singer named Lonesome Earl whose song contains some pretty biting lyrics about gun culture.

Abraham Lincoln, Gandhi, John Lemon, Sam Elliott, and others appear in the "Hee-Haw" send-up.

Carrey explained his intentions in a statement, saying, "I find the gun problem frustrating and ‘Cold Dead Hand’ is my fun little way of expressing that frustration."

He was slightly less polite on Twitter.

"‘Cold Dead Hand’ is abt u heartless motherf%ckers unwilling 2 bend 4 the safety of our kids.Sorry if you’re offended by the word safety!" he wrote as part of a longer anti-gun tirade.

Crystal Hefner Deejays Playboy Masquerade Party

From Playboy playmate to deejay!

Crystal Hefner is proving she's more than a pretty face – the 26-year-old showed off her deejay skills at Playboy's annual Mansion Masquerade party on Saturday.

Even Hugh, 86, Tweeted his excitement over his wife's impending set, "Crystal is going to DJ a part of the Playboy Masquerade Party here at the Mansion tonight. Fun."

But no one was more excited to take the stage than the centerfold, who showed off a pair of shoes covered in black glitter and a sneak peek of her red carpet, which she paired with gem encrusted headphones .

Once Crystal got behind the turntables, her doting husband shared a pic. "Crystal DJing the Masquerade party,"Hugh captioned a photo of the blonde bombshell in the deejay booth.

But the model's musical career doesn't end with the party – she's got a new single, "True Harmony," debuting on iTunes on March 25.

Just a funny thought :
No offense Hugh, but you look like 'GEOFF' on 'Craig Ferguson's  Late Late Night Show' a still breathing sickly skeleton ... HeHe

Joe Weider : Schwarzenegger's Mentor Dead at 93

Legendary fitness icon Joe Weider -- who mentored Arnold Schwarzenegger during his body building days and built a vast fitness empire -- died of heart failure today at age 93.

After his passing, Arnold released a statement, saying, "Joe didn’t just inspire my earliest dreams; he made them come true the day he invited me to move to America to pursue my bodybuilding career. I will never forget his generosity."

Weider was a god in the fitness world -- not only was he the catalyst for Arnold's impressive career, he also created a publishing empire which included "Muscle & Fitness", "Flex", "Shape" and "Men's Fitness" magazines.
Weider died Saturday at his home in L.A. He is survived by his wife, Betty.

Jay Leno : NBC Won't Pull The Plug Prematurely

Jay Leno will be beached when his contract is up ... but not a day before -- this according to sources connected to NBC.

Jimmy Fallon will be replacing Jay on "The Tonight Show" when Jay's contract is up in September, 2014. There's been a buzz that NBC may not want to wait and will make the change before Jay's contract expires. Not gonna happen.

Informed sources connected with the network tell TMZ ... when Jay renegotiated his contract during the Conan O'Brien mess, he demanded and got several penalty clauses that would make NBC take an ENORMOUS financial hit if they pull the plug early.

We do not know specifically how much of a penalty NBC would have to pay, but we're told Jay made it so big, it would be too much for NBC to swallow.

Just a thought :
JAY LENO is an oddity, an aberration when it comes to THE TONIGHT SHOW....both in looks, style, comfort and easiness. As he ages, it becomes even more discomforting late at night to ease into THE TONIGHT SHOW.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
JIMMY FALLON is NO CURE for THE TONIGHT SHOW! FALLON peaked on Saturday Night Live and seems STUCK in his SNL resume of skit humor.....not what viewers are looking for on THE TONIGHT SHOW.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
NBC "suits" are chasing their tails. NBC "suits" have received their Doctorate of FAILURE degrees many times over. NBC can't seem to focus on the HOST talent that will pass the test of time.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
You won't get the mention of "that perfect host" here....NBC honchos are paid the BIG BUCKS find THAT unique host!
-------------------------------------------------------------------
NBC, you can wine, dine and bitch and moan, but as viewers we will ultimately do the CHOOSING with our REMOTES!

Twin Prostitutes , 70 , Reveal They Have Slept With 355,000 Men

No wonder you are suffering from arthritis!': 70-year-old twin prostitutes reveal they have slept with 355,000 men as they talk about their retirement from a 50 year career in Amsterdam's red light district

Identical twins Louise and Martine Fokkens shot to fame earlier this year as stars of a documentary charting their 50 year careers as prostitutes in Amsterdam.

Now the 70-year-old Dutch sisters are celebrating their retirement with a tell-all book about their lives and the industry, and today they admitted to This Morning hosts Holly Willoughby and Phillip Schofield that they have entertained 355,000 men between them.

Louise revealed that her bad arthritis meant that she had retired from prostitution two years ago causing the telly hosts to exclaim: 'No wonder you have arthritis. You must have very flexible hips!'



Identical twins Louise and Martine Fokkens  have worked as Prostitutes in Amsterdam for fifty years .

Louise, who became a prostitute aged twenty after a brief spell making lampshades explained how she got in to the business:

'We didn't have enough money.

'My husband's friends said it was the best way to make money so we decided to find out. I was 20/21 the first time.

'At first it was a problem for our mother and father but later we all lived normally with it.

 

 

                                       Louise Fokkens 



                                  Martine Fokkens

Louise Fokkens (left) has recently retired from the game while Martine continues to works as a prostitute two to three times aweek to earn some final money before retiring on her state pension

Martine, a mother-of-three who still works as a prostitute two to three times a week said:

'My family told me about my sister while I was in the hospita my having my first baby.

'I didn't believe it but we talked about it and I loved her, that's life.'

Martine then started working at the brothel as a cleaner but two years later decided to join her sister as a prostitute after so many clients mistook her for her identical twin.

 

'I helped her with her first client: told her what she had to do and what she shouldn't do.'

Louise, who has four children and nine grandchildren said: 'I helped her with the first client: told her what she had to do, what she shouldn't do.'

Unsurprisingly the women are familiar faces around the red light district, and over their five decades working in the sex industry freed themselves from the control of their pimps, ran their own brothel, and set up the first informal trade union for prostitutes.

The women continue to be shocked at how different the industry is now to how it was in the 1960s when they first started out.

Louise said: 'It is very different now. We used to sit in the windows with clothes on, today they are totally naked.

'We have written about our life for over 50 years in the industry. It is our side of the story.

 

 

 The Fokken twins started working as prositutes in the 1960s

 

 



The 70-year-old twins admit to having entertained 355,000 men between them ....'WOW.'

 



Octomom : Authorities Probing For Possible Welfare Fraud

Octomom Nadya Suleman is under the microscope after a complaint was lodged that she committed welfare fraud ... and if it's true Octo could go to prison.

TMZ has learned ... someone made the allegation last week to the L.A. County Dept. of Welfare Fraud Prevention and Investigation (WFP&I), claiming Octo is getting various forms of welfare, including food stamps, even though she made nearly $200,000 in 2012.

Under California law, Octo can legitimately collect welfare for her and her 14 kids if she makes $119,000 or less in a calendar year, but if the allegation is true ... she exceeded the limit by a lot.

Law enforcement sources tell us ... the WFP&I is conducting a probe and has already interviewed witnesses in Octo's world.

If WFP&I determines Octo committed welfare fraud, she can be prosecuted. If convicted she could face more than 3 years in prison.

Oh, right. You're wondering how Octo could have scored nearly $200k. Answer: porn, stripping, self-pleasure videos ... the usual.

Just a thought :
How bad could it be if OctoSlut went to prison for 3 years imagine all the learning she would accomplish for her 2nd masturbation video and she could throw in one or two girls to make it really interesting.

What the f***? You can make damn near $120,000 and get welfare in California? Wow. The lawmakers there are a f***ing joke if that's true. I'd be so pissed as a taxpayer if people making that kind of money were getting foodstamps.
Nobody is going to do a damn thing about this parasite. She'll continue to leech off taxpayers forever through her special needs kids. Those kids should've been hustled away by social services the moment they were born and placed with sane, nurturing and financially secure adoptive parents.

Well yank her doodle, it's a dandy... HeHe

MJ's Family : Don't Ask 'Who's The Daddy?'

 
Michael Jackson's family is pleading with the judge in their wrongful death lawsuit against AEG Live to EXCLUDE any evidence of the paternity of MJ's 3 kids.

TMZ has obtained legal docs in which Katherine Jackson, Blanket, Paris and Prince argue ... it's irrelevant for a jury to hear evidence about the conception of the 3 kids. Specifically, they believe AEG has no right to delve into their biological parentage.

The Jackson crew also wants to exclude any evidence that MJ's siblings have financial problems. They worry AEG might try to argue that the real force behind the lawsuit is the need for cash.

And mama Jackson and the kids want the judge to bar evidence or any mention of child molestation allegations, partly because MJ was never found guilty.
A judge has yet to rule on the motions.

Just a thoughtt :
This is a joke and it would be very low AEG to bring it up. This is a ploy by AEG to make the Jacksons settle cheaper. Everybody knows Michael's sperm was not used to make these kids. So far they are all great kids. let them and the Jackson's have their secret. It is nobody's business. Till if and when the kids are all grow up and ALL THREE want to tell the world than it would be great and no surprise.

It would not matter...unless he did not legally adopt them.

Despicable Me 2 Trailer: Watch Steve Carell's Villainous Return

 Despicable Me 2 will hit theaters this summer, as the evil but charming Gru (voiced by Steve Carell) returns for an adventure featuring his goofy yellow minions and the ominous sounding Anti-Villain League.

Kristen Wigg, Russell Brand, Miranda Cosgrove, and Al Pacino also lend their vocal talents to the sequel.

Celebrity Hackers Peace ... We're Outta Here !

 
But today the hackers have called an end to their cyber war, saying, "Hello everyone, this is our final message. Behind this jolly visage of rainbows and top hats, we are people. People with a preference for music, a preference for food; we have varying taste in clothes and television, we are just like you. Even Hitler and Osama Bin Laden had these unique variations and style, and isn't that interesting to know?"

They continued, "We have enjoyed every minute of the past 12 days of providing entertainment and laughs to all of you, sadly it's time to say bon voyage - we hope - inspiration, fear, denial, happiness, approval, disapproval, mockery, embarrassment,thoughtfulness, jealousy, hate, even love."

The hackers concluded by saying, "If you believe that God makes miracles, you have to wonder if Satan has a few up his sleeve."


That last line is from the show "Dexter" ... which the hackers have been heavily influnced by.

The FBI has been investigating since before the website became public.
Just a thought as the beat goes on :
"The FBI has been investigating since before the website became public."

LOL, is that what they said? Yeah right. Is this the same FBI that publicly skewered the wrong guys for the Atlanta Olympics bombing and the Anthrax mailings, and caused the fiery deaths of innocent children in Waco, Texas?

Anyone who breaks into networks and steals sensitive information is called an attacker. Hacking is modifying code and is a name dubbed 30+ years ago by legit software people. FYI.
The celebrity hackers who have been posting the financial information of a number of celebrities have decided to call it quits ... this according to a message posted on their website.

As TMZ first reported, the website popped up earlier this week and revealed sensitive info on a slew of famous people ... including Beyonce, Jay-Z, Donald Trump, Britney Spears, Mitt Romney, Tiger Woords, Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton, Mel Gibson, Ashton Kutcher, Joe Biden, Robert Mueller, Hillary Clinton, ... and the list goes on.

Judge Judy : I'm Returning Your Dumb Dishes

Judge Judy is done fighting with her producer's very bitter ex-wife ... she's decided to return the uber-expensive silverware and china to the producer, and he's willing to give it back to his ex -- but there's a HUGE catch.

Her Honor tells TMZ, "This very unpleasant lady doesn't give a hoot about dishes. She cares about pressuring her ex-husband and the way to do that is to attempt to embarrass me."

Judy says the divorce judge called Patric Jones out for being "untruthful," "dishonest" and "misleading" during portions of her testimony ... and then Judy goes on ... "She and her attorney want a circus and I refuse to be a further participant in their drama."

And get this ... Judy, who paid her producer $50k for the dishes and flatware, says, "As Ms. Jones and her attorney assert, the items are community property, they are being packed and returned to Mr. Douthit [her producer] and she can proceed with her claim in divorce court."

So Judy -- who makes a reported $45 mil a year, will eat the $50k. And speaking of eating, her parting shot: "Anyway, my husband and I eat out most of the time."
Now part 2 -- Judy's producer gave us a statement ...

Randy Douthit says, "The dishes and silverware that Ms. Jones describes as community property are being sent to me. I am truly sorry that Judge Judy Sheindlin was brought into this domestic dispute. She relied on my statement to her that the court had authorized the sale."

Randy then sticks it to his ex, who insists the dishes are worth more than half a mil, even though the divorce judge places the value at a measly $125,000 ... "I agree with [my ex] that as community property she is entitled to half their value. She herself has valued them at more than $500,000. I do not want them and she is certainly welcome to have them as that is what she says she wants."

Randy says, "When I get the cashier's check for $250,000, I will deliver them to her."

Divorce ... it's fun.

Just a thought .... HeHe

Well, the guy is brilliant. HAHA! TMZ follow this dish drama up. I want to see that chick eat her words. She's obviously grasping at tons of straws but I have a feeling the judge will make her eat those words and deduct $250,000 from her - even though they aren't worth that much.
I feel like this Patric is going to feel very ashamed now. Judy practices tough love even on herself. I think that is pretty cool. I don't agree with all of her judgements, but I think she mainly means well. She is smart to pay $50,000 to get out of someone else's marriage hell. What does she need that for and at her age and with all her money?
She showed how classy she was while this lady wants to roll in the dirt over some dishes. Who is she going to be entertaining with fancy dishes if she isn't even married any more? The divorce is just going to cost her and her husband a fortune. They should have just stayed together and stopped being babies fighting.
I am sure she won't pay her husband a quarter million for some $50,000 used dishes. She just wanted to make her point in a public spectacle way. Judy was smart just to eat the fee and get out of it.
She cracks me up how mean she is in court sometimes, but at least she is that tough with herself also.
Just a thought :

Oprah : Terrence 'Mishaved' With My Big Breastese !

Oprah herself says don't hate on Terrence Howard for loving on her "tig ol' bitties" -- because she fully admits her rack was large and in charge during their sex scene.

Oprah taped an interview with Steve Harvey ... and talked about the scene Terrence made famous last week by blabbing about her round mounds.
Oprah told Steve ... "It was supposed to be like a little scene, and because Terrence Howard misbehaved it turned into a bigger scene, and then a bigger scene."

Can ya blame him?

As for people being offended about Howard's "tig ol' bitties" comment -- Oprah had an awesome response for that.

The Oprah interview will air April 26 on Steve Harvey's talk show.

[ Report ] Angelina Jolie , Brad Pitt Purchase Wedding Rings

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie might soon be tying the knot.
Now she just needs a dress.

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt
are one step closer to tying the knot, reportedly purchasing wedding rings from Los Angeles jeweler Neil Lane.

A stylist for the actress told InTouch Weekly she was sent to pick up the rings.

Brad : I'll Marry Angelina 'Soon.'Pitt, 48, recently hinted he and Jolie, 37, would marry soon.

"I am getting more pressure from my kids, and it is something I want to do within their lifetime, but I also feel like the time has come," he said at last month’s premiere of his new film, "Killing Them Softly."

Jolie meets with Syrian refugees at the Zaatari refugee camp in Jordan on Thursday.

The happy couple at the Berlin International Film Festival in February.
The actor — who has six children with Jolie — has been busy filming "World War Z" in London. Jolie recently wrapped "Maleficent," a Disney film in which three of the couple's children also appear.

Pax , Zahara & Vivienne join the Jolie-Pitt Family Business The couple got engaged in April.

The wedding will be a simple, family affair, Pitt said.

Reps for the couple haven't commented on the reported ring buying.
rmurray@nydailynews.com

First Vintage of Angelina Jolie-Brad Pitt ros`e Wine Sells Out Within Hours

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's wine sold out in five hours.

The couple joined forces with the Perrin family, wine makers and owners of Chateau Beaucastel in France's Chateauneuf-du-Pape region, to create a range of wines at their estate Chateau Miraval, and 6,000 bottles of Miraval Rose 2012 completely sold out after going on sale on Thursday (07.03.13).

A representative told E! News: "The sale started at 9 am, and all the bottles were sold out by 2 pm."

While the Perrin family have taken most of the responsibility for the wine production, Brad and Angelina consulted on the new bottle and redesign, which carries the names 'Jolie-Pitt and Perrin'.

Brad said: "We are intimately involved and quite enthused over the wine project with our friends the Perrin family."

Marc Perrin added: "We talked a lot and did the first harvest together. They are very demanding in seeking excellence in the quality and character of their wine."

This is not Brad and Angelina's first foray into wine production as it was previously revealed Brad wants to serve their own product Pink Floyd, at their upcoming wedding.

A source said: "Guests shouldn't be disappointed in his taste.

"He's always had a keen interest in wine and after doing his wine steward's course earlier this year, he's pretty much a certified expert.

"Brad's cellar boasts some incredibly rare wines and rivals those of some of the best connoisseurs in Europe." (C) BANG Media International

The first 6,000 bottles of Miraval rosé wine from a French vineyard owned by Hollywood stars Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt and sold out Thursday within hours of going on general sale.

"Selling started at 9:00 am (0800 GMT) and everything was sold by 2:00 pm" during the online sale, said Vitabella, a public relations firm representing the vineyard.

The vineyard's website also said that orders for the 2012 vintage were now closed.

The couple teamed up with the French winemaking Perrin family to develop the "Miraval Cotes de Provence" label, named after their Chateau Miraval estate in the south of France.

The 2012 vintage, produced from the couple's sprawling estate near the town of Brignoles, was priced at a relatively reasonable $138 per case of six bottles for the Internet sale.

Another 100,000 bottles have been sold to wine merchants and restaurants.

Chateau Miraval, a vineyard estate was bought in 2008 by Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie.
Jolie and Pitt acquired the 1,200-acre estate in 2008 for around 40 million euros and have used it as a summer residence. The estate includes around 50 to 60 acres of vines.

The couple are the latest in a long list of stars who have invested in wine, from ex-Formula One champion Michael Schumacher, singer Sting and footballer David Beckham to actor Gerard Depardieu, filmmaker Francis Ford Coppola and singer Madonna.

Marc Perrin of the family that partnered with Jolie-Pitt said in February that the couple were involved in the production process and wanted to do more than "just put their name" on the label.

"They want to be proud of the wine on their property. They are really looking for excellence," he said, adding that the estate would later look to also produce red and white wines.